Lag B'Omer

The fields lie rich with seeds, life emerging tender, frail.
You feel joy rising through your bones.
You are ready
to release yourself into life's mysteries,
calling upon the name of God
Magen,
Shield of your soul,
Defender of your being,
as you wander through unchartered lands


Magen,
shield me as I walk
for this journey is fraught with dangers.
The land is rugged, barren and scarce, only thistles thrive.
And the process of healing is as challenging as is the land.

Parts of the soul yet mourn, for slavery injures the spirit,
and in this, the cleansing time, the soul aches
need be felt, that I might remember, deeply know,
that living in captivity is not my natural state.

It is as if this time is engraving on my awareness the after effects of
the experience of slavery
so that I might here after recognize it subtle encroachments
and know to leave it, leave it quickly,
should it reenter my life.
It is not my native destiny.

Magen,
You Who protect me.
I number my days cleansing my soul to meet You
and You, in turn take stock of me, waiting for me to truly be free enough
to join with You.

We count each other, numbering that which we love and
that with which we struggle.
I yearn for You yet pull away not yet ready, this too, part of my preparation.

And so I walk, wrestling with that which tries to steal me from life
until one morning as I wake I find manna on the ground.
A token of your care.
And then each morning, there it is again.

And I feel Your Hand feeding me, holding me, helping me mend,
softly, lovingly.

Until one day I know my mourning time is done.
A time of celebration has arrived and into the woods I go.
Exuberantly I raise my bow to the sky, aiming my arrows upwards.
They fly through the air pointing the way towards the future, into the
unknown, revealing new directions.
And the flames of my bonfire at night illuminate fresh possibilities.
And these I celebrate. They are as precious water in the desert sent by You to
reinvigorate my spirit.
They fortify me as I make my way, forward.

And I dance
just beginning to learn the steps,
just beginning to learn how to dance with You
as my partner.

Magen,
be with me.
Dance with me.
Safeguard me as I find my way to You.
My Shield,
My Helper.